Expat-Blog Post: FAQs Part I

Being a member at www.expat-blog.com, I have been receiving some friend requests and private messages from my Kababayans. Hence, I thought about blogging the common questions I answer constantly, both as private messages and from the forum itself.

Q: Where is it easier to get married? In the Philippines or in Germany?
A: It all depends on you. The first steps are usually the same: NSO birth certificate, NSO CENOMAR, cedula and then sending them to your fiance to process his Ehefähigkeitszeugnis. Anyway, my friend described on her blog a more detailed procedure about marrying in the Philippines, it's best to read her posts for more information (please click here). We did exactly the same things that they did, but in shorter time. We just got really lucky to get our wedding preparation and our wedding itself done within the 21 days visa-free entry of my husband in the Philippines. It is safest to tell your fiance to apply for visa more than 21 days, at least a month or two maybe? And plan everything ahead, best would be that you start planning during his/her vacation/ engagement day. Never try what we did, we just got really lucky that there was a free venue, and our videographer is a family friend.


Q: What does one do when we opt to get married in Germany?
A: Please click here for the requirements that you need to accomplish. The link is from the German Embassy. Please check the embassy website from time to time, in case that there are changes.

Q: How about for family reunion visa?
A: Aside from my friend's blog, which I have already the link posted on the first question, please click here for the list from the German embassy.


Q: Does one really needs language certificate before applying for Marriage Visa or Family Reunion Visa?
A: Again, it all depends on your situation. I have learned from a friend, that when you already have a kid with your German spouse, you do not need the language certificate anymore if you are applying for family reunion visa. For marriage visa, I still have to ask further. However, you lose nothing from attending the language class and taking the exam, at least the Start Deutsch 1. Why? Because even if you opt for the exemption, the Ausländersbehörde in Germany would still require you to take the course anyway. Unless your husband is open to paying the fine for not taking the Integrationskurs. Hence, learning German in Germany would be easier for you, you won't be shocked from the language, because the learning environment in Germany is totally different from the what one may experience in Goethe Institut Manila. I guess, for beginners, it is really helpful when you can ask your classmates using your native language than asking in German.

Q: I have no time to attend the classes in Goethe due to my work. Can I do it on my own?
A: Absolutely! There are lots of websites to go to to learn the German language. Most helpful for me are the following websites:

• http://www.german.about.com
• http://www.busuu.com
• http://www.livemocha.com

There are also lots of videos available in YouTube website for learning german, just use the search box. And of course the Goethe Institut website itself for the sample of Start Deutsch 1 exam. Just take note that only the exam from Goethe is accredited by the embassy, hence, you must only take the exam there and not from any other language schools.

Q: Is it difficult to find job in Germany?

A: If your German is conversational enough, there are lots of Nebenjobs waiting for you. If you want real jobs, you need a bit of patience, because I myself is still in the process of job hunting. Nebenjobs are fine, but in my case, I have to choose wisely which job to take due to my health conditions, I cannot apply in supermarket because I have scoliosis and I am not allowed to lift/ carry heavy boxes, hence, not all nebenjobs fit me.

So, that's it for now. Will post the part two as soon as I got to gather enough questions to answer. Please note that these questions are tailored for my fellow Filipinos. There might be other rules governing other country. It is advisable that you post your own questions in the forum or search for expats in Germany who are also from your country and ask them thru private messages.

Being Hospitalized in a Foreign Land

I guess, of all the expats all around the world, I am the only one who has fully integrated myself to the land I chose to migrate, not only on everyday life, but also on not-usual-events such as HOSPITALIZATION.

Staying in the hospital is not something new to me, for I used to be a sickly kid. However, system here in Germany is totally different in my homeland, and I was shocked. The day I was admitted was also not so good because the hospital was full. Hence, even if my sickness was not something too serious (based on the initial findings), I have to stay in a room with patients of stroke. A lot of visitors have their curious eyes on me, why a young woman like me is on this station. We got no choice, the doctors wanted to look at me over time hence I have to stay there. I had to stay there for four days, and I found that a bit depressing.

Back in the Philippines, at least one family member is allowed to stay with you all throughout the time you are confined in the hospital. In that way, when something hurts, or you find it difficult to eat alone, you got your "support group" around. But here, I have to endure 4 long days alone, doing all stuffs by myself. That is not a problem for me, but I feel sorry for the elderly. I got a roommate who is 86 years old.  She can still do stuffs on her own but I feel sorry that she has to stay there all alone, with strangers, when it is already almost sunset of her life. While our visitors come and go all throughout the days, hers did not come, I never got to know her daughter that she always calls. She sits all day until 9 in the evening by the window, wishing and hoping to see her son or daughter's car coming in. I feel sad and can't help not to compare the system to the Philippines. I came into a realization then, that we shall move back to the Philippines before my mom reaches that age. I would ensure that I am there and that she would not have to sit by the window and waiting and waiting.

Anyway, back to the topic, aside from this system, I also witnessed first hand how unmanned the nurses here are. For morning shift, there are around 4 or 5 nurses, including the trainees, but at night, there are only 2 of them. I could not blame though that not a lot of people chooses this profession here. The pay is not that much, and it requires a lot of their energy, physically and emotionally. This situation is not different from the Philippines. I used to have a room mate who was a nurse in a private hospital in the Philippines and she complains about the hard work and less pay they receive, that's why she made sure that she can leave the country and serve in the US. Today, she is indeed in the US with her family, but I have no more idea about the difference between US and Philippines's salary for nurses. I can only speak for Germany, and it is not good. Yes, they are earning euros. Say a Filipina nurse moves here to work, converting the money that she'll earn, that would definitely be more than how much she earns in the Philippines, it can be 5 times more than that. However, the cost of living here in Germany is not cheap. The apartment costs already at least €500 (I am speaking only here in our county), the electricity and water and internet or phone can sum up to around €300 or €400. She still has to eat and for her transportation, either by bus or with own car (on which the gas fluctuates every hour). Hence, the life of a nurse here can be really difficult. This is one of the professions that I believe, should be receiving more than what they are receiving today. They work really hard, the responsibilities that they carry on their shoulders on every shift they take. I wish that the politicians will get to see this reality.

And lastly, as an expat, being hospitalized in a foreign land with a totally different language is really difficult! Luckily, I can understand a lot of things already, though I still stutter when I speak. Imagine your sickness being explained to you in foreign language. The word "nausea" that I am accustomed to since I was a kid suddenly became "Übelkeit." The heart murmur that I have since time immemorial is termed as "Herzschlag." And finally, the simple term of "Vertigo" I usually say when I get this dizziness (or Schwindel) suddenly became "Gleichgewichtsstörung." I was alone in the hospital and speaks with the doctors and nurses about their findings and hearing all these foreign words for the first time. My husband had mixed emotions that time. One side, he is worried, and on the other side, he is proud. He could not believe that I survived it and I was able to communicate with my doctors and understand them completely! I, myself, was surprised with myself. 

I am already home, but my treatment is not yet complete. I still have a pending MRI test due next week, which gives me headache and depression. Everytime I hear MRI and that the brain shall be scanned, I only have one thought in mind: brain tumor. I am so afraid that they will find tumor and then that will be the end of all my dreams. I still have lots of dreams and things that I wanted to accomplish, which I am afraid that one tumor will end it just like that. Like what I've said earlier, I still wanted to take care of my mom during her old days, hence I wanted to live longer than my mom. I am afraid that a tumor will end everything and I shall leave all the people I love alone, nobody to take care for them. I fervently pray that whatever they'll find on my brain would not end all my dreams.

Ausländers Problem: Finding New Friends

Officially, I am 9 months and five days here in Germany. I admit, I still do not have someone who I can call my "new friend." I still hang out most of the time with my husband. I tried to follow a fellow Expat Blog forumer's advice in order to get going here: to register on various international forums and sites and meet up with people there. I did, I am a member of Expat Blog, InterNations, Philippinen Portal Forum, and Pinay in Deutschland group page on Facebook. I receive lots of meet up invites, especially thru InterNations, but I have not yet gone into one. My husband is totally supportive about this, but it is I who have a problem.

You may wonder whether I have friends back in my homeland. Of course I do, but those people I consider as friends would only sum up to 50 maximum. Contrary to what they say, that Filipinos are friendly people, I admit I am not. These friends of mine, I became friends with them because they never stopped winning me as their friend. They are the ones who first approached me, talked with me, asked me questions. Even if my answers would only consist of about 2 to 5 words, they never stopped until the time we are already comfortable with each other and they already tell me to shut up because I talk too much. That is how I get friends, I just sit at one corner and let time pass me by, allowing people to talk with me. Only the persistent and patient ones became my friends, others are just acquaintances.

I am sitted in a new corner in my new country. I am patiently waiting for new people who would pass by to talk with me. However, they are not Filipinos, they are not as patient and friendly as the people back in my homeland, that's one reason why my husband insists that I stand and walk into the crowd and introduce myself. But I know I cannot do that, else I will faint. I do not have such gift, I am not Miss Congeniality.

I guess I have to endure longer until I find a job. It is because I get to meet new friends when I am at work or at school, but I never get to win friends just around my community, it is because they have totally different interests and they get easily bored on me.

Maybe other foreigners do not experience this same problem I am in right now. But honestly, this is killing me. I do not know what can I do with myself to find new friends. I want to have new friends, but I do not know how to start good conversations and how to trust them. It is just that I had been through a lot and I got traumatized on trusting people because they always end up abusing my kindness and generosity.

I am thankful though that my husband is helping me through all these.

Ausländer's Problem: Language (Sprache)

So I have posted a poem today for my husband for the reason that we got into a fight the night before yesterday. That was also the reason why there was a lot of hatred posts before today, I am sorry, I was carried away by my emotions. Anyway, I am not quite sure if I should write more in German so that he can fully understand my thoughts or just write in the language I am most comfortable:English and Filipino. It is because I still do not have the full confidence to use the German language. The translation I wrote there was purely rough. I am fully aware I got lots of error there. Still, I decided to publish it despite and inspite of errors it contains. I mean, one cannot learn without committing any mistake.

Anyway, I had blogged once that my DTZ exam was near. Today, I am proud to say that I have passed it! I am now certified that I can read, speak and write in B1 level of German! Here is the CEFR (Common European Framework of Reference) description of B1:

Can understand the main points of clear standard input on familiar matters regularly encountered in work, school, leisure, etc. Can deal with most situations likely to arise whilst travelling in an area where the language is spoken. Can produce simple connected text on topics which are familiar or of personal interest. Can describe experiences and events, dreams, hopes & ambitions and briefly give reasons and explanations for opinions and plans.


I know it is still not enough. However, it is enough for me to be able to go on to the next level. B2 classes will start on 3. September and it is only twice a week. That means that B2 will take around 6 months instead of 3 months. Now, the dilemna is, we are flying to the Philippines and will be staying there for 8 weeks! (Yes, we are! ) That means if ever I enroll for the next class, I am going to miss around 14-15 meetings (minus the Christmas break already) which is a lot and is not good for a learner since each day means harder yet important lessons. Therefore, I am thinking that I'd take that class when we get back from our tropical vacation. That also means that I will no longer be classmates with my friends. But it also means that I am going to win new friends.

It is totally different here and adjustment takes time. But I am glad that I am almost halfway there. I can say that I am confident enough to apply on real German jobs, or take Ausbildung. I just hope that these companies would really give me a chance to prove myself to them.

I can finally smell my beautiful future in the Land of Beer and Sausages!