I thought I was ready when I decided to apply for visa to be with my husband, but I thought wrong. Three months living here seems to be soooo long for me. I miss a lot of things am used to doing way back in the Philippines, and one of which is... WORKING.
I have been unemployed for 9 months now, longest I have no job since I finished my university degree. Though I worked for a freelance writing job for three months from my nine months and one month used for wedding preparation and wedding itself. So basically, it's really 5 months doing totally nothing.
I miss working, that's for real. Sometimes, I am thinking about going back to the Philippines and get back to my old life. But I know I shouldn't. My husband don't mind it at all, he said whatever I want, he'll support me all the way. But I won't do that. We had fought two straight years away from each other, and now that we are married, it is just not right to turn my back just because my life is not turning out the way I want it to be here in Germany. I definitely won't do that. I will stay here and take one step at a time. I know it will take longer time before I can establish myself here, my life and my career.
Starting anew as a foreigner is so tiring at times. But I just have to look forward and think positively. With my husband with me, I know this journey and hardship would all be worth it.
*Sorry, am just so emotional these past few days... Then I saw this advertisement about a training opportunity at Heraeus, and it made me feel more eager to get a job. But first, I need to go back to my Sprachkurs and pass the exams.*
