Wednesday, November 21, 2012
Missing The Days
I miss working as a process engineer. My short stay at HGST (then Hitachi) was my most dramatic and unforgettable work experience. If ever I am still living in the Philippines and somebody would ask me to go back, maybe I'll really consider going back, provided that Sir Pepot will be my manager. Maybe he was right, one thing that triggered me to resign was that reorganization. Because if not, if it is the work in general, then I won't be writing anything this time.
I miss being a simple me at work, where I do not have to dress up to impress since I would either wear an electrostatic jacket or cleanroom suit whole day. Where I do not have to worry about having the most expensive shoes I can afford since we are all wearing the same shoes whole day, literally. I miss the stressful days that always starts with a meeting and then a whole day of different challenges and endless responsibilities. I miss waking up early and sleeping late, or worst, being awakened by a phone call after an hour or two of sleep. I miss being the last process engineer in the plant before shutdown and also the first one before start up. I miss the feeling of seeing my planner full of tasks to be done and the feeling when I have to search through the pages for a specific task that was recently accomplished: oh! What a fulfillment it was to put that check mark next to it! It was really a stressful job, but I have learned a lot, and I did enjoy every moment I was there.
But why I left HGST, if I really loved the job? I know alot may ask. Honestly, on my last day, as I try to solve one last issue with teary eyes, there was one question on my head: is this really what I wanted? I wanted to run to the management and the HR personnel and tell them, "Wait! That letter was not meant for you, it was part of a novel I am trying to write!" But then, I know, no one would believe me, because the addressee was correct and my ego told me I can't do that because my last sentence there was "This decision is final and irrevocable." So after that last endorsement and a short meeting with Nessie and Sir Romy, I went down quietly, asking a friend to help me escape because I do not want to be applauded by the whole engineering team (a tradition I do not know from where it started), because I was not really proud of my decision. Took my shoes off, cleared up my locker and walked through that metal detector for the last time.
One thing that made me draft that letter was STRESS. A kind of stress that either shopping or a cup of coffee at my favorite coffee shop can cure. However, it is totally impossible for me to have this theraphy anytime that I wanted. First of all, going out of the vicinity is not that easy, one must first secure a pass to go out, which reminded me of my high school days. That was something unfathomable. I wanted to do some destressing at the coffee shop, but I cannot easily do that, even if Paseo de Santa Rosa was just a few kilometer away. I do not want the common coffee at the vendo machine, I wanted to really pamper myself in order to get back my energy (yes, I am sometimes maarte). Sometimes, I wanted to treat myself lavishly for lunch, but again, it's impossible. I guess, I got tired of those trying-hard Japanese/ Mongolian/ Filipino dishes served at the cafeteria and my normal mind stopped working properly and simply printed and signed that resignation letter without thinking twice. Before I knew it, it was already being discussed on our next meeting. I was so full of myself that I did not want to revoke my letter even if Ma'am Jenny had asked me million times. One question from Sir Pepot made me think though, he asked that if ever there was no reorganization, would have I done the same or would have I stayed? I believe, I was not able to answer him. I have learned a lot under his and Sir Kerry's management, that even if I am not an engineering graduate but a chemistry graduate, they helped me get through the job and trusted me of lots of responsibilities and believed on my capabilities. Whatever had I accomplished there, it's all through their help and trust. But I got no time to go back there and revoke my resignation, my last day was a Friday and the following week, I started with Emerson. But don't get me wrong here, I do not regret working with Emerson either. Emerson gave me a totally different experience and learnings. I got to see the other side of the world, which led me to the arms of my husband. I also got great colleagues and had happy moments with them as well. What only lacked was the challenges and the variation on my everyday task. Back-office job was so routine that I was culture-shocked when I started at Emerson. There were moments of boredom when I have thought of resigning and going back to HGST, but I cannot, because of the bond I have to pay if did that. So I confined myself staring whole day at my computer, going through all the folders of Service aand Training departments, searching for something new and interesting, and when these did not work out against my boredom, I enrolled at Goethe Institut even if my job does not really requires fluency in German language. I started learning a new language in order to give a little spice in my life as a working individual. I was really thankful I did it, because I am making use of it this time.
Saturday, November 3, 2012
Mir/ Mich Und Dir/ Dich Sind Immer Noch Meine Probleme
Ich weiß nicht mehr, was ich tun muss, um diese Pronomen richtig benutzen zu können. Mit den Präpositionen (mit, bei, nach, zu) habe ich kein Problem aber mit bestimmten Verben und diesen Wechslungspräpositionen (an, in, auf) sind meine Sätze schon ganz chaotisch!
Es macht mich schon manchmal ein wenig deprimiert.
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